Mar 2017

The real reason we’re moving to Massachusetts (and the reason you should move too)

If you follow me on Instagram, you’ve seen that we’re in Massachusetts this week looking at houses and laying the foundation for our new lives. I wanted to share why we’re making this move this summer because it’s probably not what you think.

When we moved to San Francisco from New York City 6 years ago for Jonathan’s residency,  I always had a suspicion that we’d move back to the East Coast but we were open to loving life in California and settling there permanently. There are a lot of reasons to stay like Jonathan having great medical connections, our amazing community here of women and families who love and support us and a culture that has nourished and called forth my inner witch. It would be super easy to stay.

But something has always felt a bit off.  

My body doesn’t feel good in California. I don’t feel connected to the land. I have trouble feeling grounded and truly at home. It’s like taking a grey wolf and putting her on Hawaii. She’ll probably do fine, but it’s not ideal.

I believe that just like animals, we all have ideal environments.  

I think our ideal environment could be guided by one or all of the following…

  • Our ancestry
  • Where we were born or raised
  • Past life connections
  • Our Soul’s journey

Maybe you grew up in Ohio and live in Chicago (awesome city btw) but you feel so called to live in Paris.  Maybe you lived there in a past life and it’s your true home.

Maybe you live in New York City and dream of surfing every night and can’t stop researching surf camps when you should be working. Maybe your soul knows you’re meant to learn how to surf and live on the ocean to get all the lessons that come with that lifestyle.

Maybe you were born in the Dominican Republic and moved to Seattle for College and stayed because it’s where you got a job, but your sense of joy, adventure and sensuality totally died.  Maybe you need to find an environment that is closer to the one you grew up in so you feel alive again.

Maybe your parents moved to Texas for your Dad’s job when you were 10 and now you have kids and want to be near them, but every time it’s cold and rainy you feel your whole system relax.  Maybe your Irish roots have taken hold and you need to move to a place with four seasons and lots of rain.

For me, it’s a combination of all the above. When I’m in Temple with the Divine Feminine, I have remembrances of dancing in the woods inside a circle of oak trees in the middle of night. When I’m in New England my body grows roots and feels locked into the Earth. I feel ancient and timeless. Every sound, smell, and feeling are familiar. I feel called to do specific work with a specific community. When I just think of the first snowfall or warm summer nights on the porch, I get teary. When I’m here, I can feel the magic.  

I feel at home in my body when I’m at home on the land. 

So… do you feel truly at home where you live?  

What excuses are you making to not move where you belong?

What would it take for you to make a big move?

I know moving is a big deal, but that doesn’t mean you can’t do it. In fact, I believe that we are defined by the big decisions we make in our life. Pushing ourselves way outside our comfort zone is what inspires the most growth.  

It was a bit easier for us to make a timing decision because we knew Jonathan was finishing his residency this June, but we still had to go through all of the same steps anyone would have to in order to relocate. We started the process about a year and a half ago. We talked about all the places we could live. Argued about it. Faced our limiting beliefs. Questioned our motives (like are we just moving there because my parents are there? I was clear that if my parents lived in a place I didn’t like, I would for sure not move there to be close to them. But is having them there a HUGE bonus? Oh yeah.) We finally came to an agreement that Massachusetts was where we wanted to be. Jonathan started looking for jobs immediately (2 years before he could start, which is way ahead of time even for a doctor). 

Jonathan did all the practical things he needed to do to find a job, and I did my magic on the side;).  The truth is that Urology jobs don’t come up that often bc it’s such a small field, but sure enough the first site that came up on Google had a picture of all the Urologists in the practice, and there was a physician he worked with for a month in medical school when he was on rotation in Seattle.  (Not) So random. He called her up. They were hiring. Jonathan loved the practice, it’s an all around perfect job for him. He knocked their socks off and he got the job 18 months before he could start. A great reminder that the Universe is always conspiring for your highest good. 

There is no doubt in my mind that I was meant to be in San Francisco for this chapter in my life. It has cracked me open and taught me so much. And I am so excited to bring this new version of myself back to my old stomping ground. 

And of course, connect with you if you’re nearby:).

Wishing you the courage to feel the roots of your true home.


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  • I looooved this article. It is so true that some places just don’t feel like home. My husband and I lived in Marin (just across the bay) for six years before we moved to Salt Lake City despite having no attachments here. But then when we got here, we realized that we did. My sister was born here, and I was baptized here. My godparents still live here, and now we live right across the street from a beautiful cathedral that is the only cathedral in the US dedicated to Mary Magdalene. I can’t place it. But I feel home here. And I think I’ll feel even more so once we buy a home here. Thanks Sarah!

  • Nina

    Hi Sarah,
    I think like you. I always use this image: A tree can’t grow in a breeding ground… Yes it can but you’ll not see beautiful flowers and green leaf on it.
    I’m like this tree in that bad land. Since I’m teenager and I’m 33 now I wanted to leave my town. Time pasted… studies, jobs, love… But the desire
    to leave my town and my country stayed. I’m 33, I still don’t know what I want to do in my life… I’m not 100% happy. All I know is that I need to leave!
    Why I’m stuck here? Because I have no job since 1 and half year, Where I live it’s really expensive and I have debt,,, But I don’t loose hope. Because
    now I know that all I have to do is to find a job (whatever it is), save money, pay my debt and leave! I just hope it will happen soon. It’s been so long
    that I live next to my life… So Sarah, yes I understand you. Not every place are for everyone. I would love to live in California! 😉

    • I believe you can find your happiness by looking within and seeing all the gifts in your life. There is a place for you and your bright light!

      • Nina

        I am. I’m trying. But I’m not happy here. I’m a positive person. Every challenges that come across since more than 6 years now I always tried to find a positive issue. I have good parents, nice cat, I’m pretty inside and outside. But I’m not in the good place. It’s exhausting to try to fit in a place that which don’t want you and you don’t like. I stayed here because I had lovestories, every time the lovestories ended I asked to myself “why you are still here if you don’t like this town?”. It’s exhausting to live here, in this selfish town… Where you have a future only if you want kids and only if you have diplomas… I feel lonely…
        Few months ago I met a guy who told me that all the certificates I have was not recognized by the system. All the years I worked hard to have this certificate… had no values for the state?!… So I decided it was enough to try to fit in this life and I have to take my courage and my dreams seriously and move somewhere else. Somewhere I will be accepted for who I am and all my good energies and talents…

        Did you found a house in Massachusetts? Take care Sarah!
        PS: Really cute the video of your daughter today on Insta!!

        • You absolutely have everything it takes to be authentically you in a space you call home! I believe in you. Still working on the house- but will be there soon. xo

  • mary kennard

    I follow you on instagram and have always admired your courageous spirit! I am a sf bay area native and have not had the opportunity to travel much. As I reflect on your story I must consider that one of the reasons for this is because I’ve learned to quiet MY wants. At this stage in my life, I try to combine travel and business, so that I have an EXCUSE to travel! Maine has been calling me for about a year now…I have waited for the universe to arrange for a business opportunity there..but after reading your post, I might just make it happen, JUST BECAUSE! Thank you for your insight, and best of luck on a safe and happy move!

    • Absolutely- you should go and check it out! I believe it is so important to follow our instinct- you never know where it can lead you. Let me know any updates from your adventure. xo

  • Hi Sarah,

    I’m a born and raised New Englander who left home for a decade to explore (I lived in California for a time, too!) but felt called home by my bones.
    Welcome home. 🙂

  • Susan Pitkowsky

    What you said is exactly how I’ve felt, but could not ever pinpoint! I was born in New York City, raised nearby until I moved to New Orleans at age 12 with my family. New Orleans is a really great place to live and to experience the culture, but I never felt truly “at home” there, and returned to the northeast for college, and have stayed ever since. I loved living in the south, and being exposed to that way of life has certainly helped shape me into who I am today, but I never could understand why I felt such a pull to return to New York. Also, my dad moved to Los Angeles when I was 10, and I’ve visited dozens of times (and love it there), but have never felt a pull to ever live there. Now I know why…you hit the nail on the head when you mentioned being connected to the land. That’s exactly what I feel when I’m in or near NYC, or the beach where I spent my summers. Thank you for helping me to realize why I’ve had trouble feeling grounded, and why I’m so determined to return to that beach.

    • Yay, Susan! I am so glad this resonated and inspired you. Keep me posted on your homecoming! xo

  • Sarah, you are spot on sista! This blog post really lit me up. Back in July I returned to my hometown to get help from my family while I recover some major health stuff. It’s been really interesting how thankful my body is for grass. I lived in southern California for the past 3 years and there is a drought. My body did craved grass. Earthing is a real thing.
    So now that I am on the road to recover and visioning where do I want to be? The Ozark hills feel like home to my body. That feels shocking because spiritually and soul growth California and Hawaii were a much better fit. Hawaii feels like home to me, still, after being away for nearly four years, but it is too far from the mainland at this stage in my life.
    I am dreaming of buying a house with a grassy yard and a sun porch, of exploring the woods with tall trees where rivers flow, and learning from the Native Americans in the area about connection to the earth, ancient healing wisdom, and restorative practices in tribes and families. I am pretty clear I will not stay in my hometown past a year from now. It’s good to have some distance and feel it’s easy to spread my wings. So I am following my intuition and exploring the ozarks region, feeling out where I want to root.
    Thank you for sharing about your upcoming move & the real reason why you’re all headed back east.

Sarah Jenks

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