A few days ago, I took the baby to meet my friend Nisha for lunch. That morning, I was dealing with dirty diapers, dishes and general domestic disarray. It would’ve been so easy to call her and cancel — she would understand, right? But I’ve been through situations like this enough times to know exactly what I need to do to feel better.
So I got the baby comfortable and focused on me for a minute. After 30 minutes I managed to leave the house looking super hot (if I do say so myself!) with a calm baby in tow. I met Nisha at one of our favorite cafe’s and she’d had an “interesting” morning, too, planning for her upcoming website launch and managing her own version of crazy.
As I sit here today, I’m reflecting on the tone of the moment — me doing an epic juggling act to just get out of the house (did I mention I looked hot?!) and Nisha playing the chess game of sustaining her business while planning a launch (any entrepreneur knows how challenging this can be). Yet both of us were taking time for ourselves and our friendship (which ultimately serve the baby and the business), and neither of us were weighed down with anxiety. In fact, we were both happy, smiling…even relaxed.
There was a time when we didn’t look this way. I remember sipping tea with Nisha years ago, high on caffeine and nerves that our next launches had to be perfect, that our websites weren’t going to be done on time, and what if we ended up missing the boat to motherhood? To be honest, we were kind of Anxious Annie’s.
But what we learned is that being stressed and worried doesn’t help you produce better results…if anything, you actually make more mistakes because you’re not paying attention.
Listen, we’re not perfect. We have our moments of feeling like we’re flailing and failing, too — we’re human! But what we’ve learned to do is find the calm in the storm and get back to grounded. Through learning how to be both focused and calm- truly embodying ease- we’ve learned to be so grounded in ourselves that we feel like powerful women. We want that for you, too… because when you’re always running, you miss the beauty all around you.
Below, we’ve put together our Top 7 Ways to Embody Ease.
On Wednesday, we started our LIVE FREE Online Event with talking about the intersection of Ambition & Ease. You can get the recording here if you missed the live class. Next week, on Wednesday, April 16th you’ll have the opportunity to be personally coached by us. We’ll be digging into your biggest work/life conundrums and coaching you to find clear solutions for having the success you want. You can sign up here.
1. Dress your body beautifully.
I wanted to share this photo, which I took in an airport bathroom. I had put on frumpy travel clothes and in a moment of clarity realized that I felt crappy because I wasn’t dressed beautifully. When you take a few moments to select an outfit and jewelry you feel frickin’ fantastic in…even on a Tuesday…you’re going to have a better day. Your body is the home of your soul. She is your temple. Do you throw any old junk on your temple, or do you adorn her in things that represent your reverence for Her? Even if you’re feeling far-from-loving towards your body, this is critical, because this is how you cultivate the appreciation that has you and your body feel like true life partners. Is there something small you can do right now to tend to your temple?
2. Enjoy gorgeous food.
Before you sit down to eat, are you aware of how beautiful your plate looks? In life, beauty causes us to pause in appreciation. When no attention is put on cultivating beauty, there are fewer opportunities to slow down and enjoy. By simply adding a sprig of herbs or some edible flowers to your plate, or carefully arranging each dish to appeal to your aesthetic sensibility, you will naturally find yourself in appreciation. When you’re appreciating your food, you eat slower. When you eat slower, you taste more. When you eat slower and taste more, you derive maximum enjoyment from your food and end up eating just the right amount for your beautiful body. Taking care of your body often has less to do with eating the perfectly-perfect thing at the perfect time, and more to do with crafting a beautiful experience and enjoying.
3. Break the weekend rules.
For some reason, much of the world has agreed to adopt the “work your ass off, then you can play” mentality, which means weekends are our only hope for fun and our only opportunity for release. This is when we break loose and eat whatever we want to eat, drink whatever we want to drink, and finally enjoy life…for 48 hours. Then, we spend the next 120 hours miserable, dreaming of that precious 48 to come ‘round again. This sucks! Who says we have to buy into that crazy crap?! When you bring some of your favorite weekend activities into your weekdays (lunch with friends, dinner on the patio, cocktail hour, etc), your LIFE feels awesome — not just your weekends. What can you do this week to infuse more weekend energy into your Monday-Friday?
4. Stop to smell the roses…then bring them to work.
Do you ever walk by shops that have flowers outside, or have flowers springing up along the sidewalks in your neighborhood? How often do you stop to smell those flowers? This simple act of slowing down for just a minute (yes, even you can spare 1 minute) is enough to hit the reset button on your mental state. Most women get into a super masculine mode at work — we “buckle down” and “suck it up” in order to “make it happen”. Phew. Yes, business requires planning and plenty of action, but do you have to be a stress case while you’re doing it? Bring some pleasure into your workspace and work day, and integrate your feminine flow with your masculine focus.
5. Invest in your aliveness.
Most of us find it much easier to justify spending money (and time) on replacing a broken dishwasher, developing a business strategy and buying new shoes for the kids, than we do on investing in ourselves. It’s not to say that your clean dishes, business success and kids’ footwear aren’t important — they are! But how about you — the woman holding it all together? How are you holding up… are you hanging on by a thread or fully-alive and thriving? This year, I invested my time and money in a gorgeous book writing retreat & a boudoir photoshoot, so I could be more deeply connected with my sexy. Nisha fulfilled my long-time dream of traveling to Peru & also had a boudoir photoshoot — a gift to myself for her 34th bday. These things don’t give us instant money, but they do give us instant — and lasting — satisfaction. Invest in your aliveness.
6. Live in the most beautiful place on earth.
How do you feel when you walk into your home? Do you look around and see piles of crap and a bunch of unfinished business…or do you see gorgeous flowers and a clean, inviting space that totally feels like you? If your home is less than a sanctuary, take an hour to love it up this evening. Arrange a stack of your favorite books on your coffee table, put away stray jackets or shoes, dust the surfaces and light a candle. Bonus points if you can add a fresh flower arrangement. Your home is the nest for your precious body and your valuable ideas — shouldn’t it be the best nest it can be?
7. Appreciate other women.
You’ve probably noticed (or felt victim of) the social hierarchy amongst women. We tend to compare ourselves to one another based on our income, weight, relationship status, education, and so on. Every single time you appreciate the unique beauty (inside and out) of your sisters, you’re doing your part to break down that social hierarchy, to be real friends, confidants and soul sisters. Nisha and I should know — we used to be super jealous of each other, until we focused on the very real admiration we have for each other.
We can’t wait to talk about all of this and more with you on Wednesday. If you haven’t signed up yet, visit LiveFreeRetreat.com.
Simple actions to take your life back, know your worth & feel alive no matter how drained, overwhelmed and far gone you feel.