Do you look like your facebook photo?

Blog · Your Body · Your Self


During Live More Weigh Less this spring, a participant was worried that the photo she posted as part of our forum was going to show up on facebook, google etc. and be visible to the world.  It spurred a deep and meaningful discussion in our group about the fear and embarrassment of “being seen” and a lot of the women bravely admitted to using an old “thinner” picture of themselves on facebook, a picture of their dog, or something where you could barely see them.

It may seem innocent and a necessary protection of our egos, but here’s why looking like your facebook photo is so important:

1. When we are avoiding showing what we look like to the world, it’s the same thing as shoving a child in the closet and saying, “You are too ugly to be seen, don’t come out until you’re prettier, better and more acceptable.”  How do you think that child is going to feel?  Probably worthless and depressed.  And what do you think she’s going to do to soothe her misery?  That’s right, eat.

2. For better or worse, facebook is one of the main ways we present ourselves and our value to the world.  When we favor a photo of what we used to look like, or an object, over who we are today, we send a message that being thin or anonymous is more important than who we are.

3. When we put up an “ideal” we create constant pressure to live up to our curated reality.  Every time you see that picture of yourself I bet you think, “God, I should look like that. Why can’t I get my sh*t together? I hope I don’t run into anyone I know today, they’re gonna know I’m a fraud!”  Talk about anxiety.

Here’s my invitation to you: Instead of choosing the thinnest picture of you, choose the happiest picture of you.  Choose a photo that shows who you are today, on the inside and out.  If you don’t have one, take one!  Bring a friend on an adventure, go to the beach, ride bikes, plan a picnic, and capture the moment.


We care more about knowing you, seeing and connecting, not about how defined your cheek bones are or how perfect your hair is.  You don’t need to change, you just need to be more of who you are.

I want you to change your facebook photo today, and leave me a note on my page ( to let me know you did it so I can cheer you on.

And if you’re comfortable, help me spread the word:  Tweet it: Do you look like your @facebook photo? @Sarahejenks is challenging us to post the happiest pic not the thinnest pic.

I can’t wait to see your beautiful face:)



P.S.  Live Free Sonoma is selling out fast, and I’d love the chance to hang out with you in person this fall.  We’re going to be spending a lot of time experiencing being seen and stepping into more of who you truly are.  It’s going to challenging, life changing and a total blast.  If you wanna check out the details, you can click here: LIVE FREE Retreat.

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