Photo by Abi Q Photography of Sarah (working that felt hat) styled by Melanie Kluger
When I first met Melanie, she walked in wearing a straw fedora and a killer smile and I instantly knew I not only wanted to work with her, I wanted to be her friend. We are totally cut from the same cloth. Catch us shopping for a photoshoot together and you can’t tell if it’s two best friends on a mall extravaganza or two co-workers planning next week’s shoot. That’s because we are doing both. Melanie has been my stylist for the past three years. We have worked together on everything from speaking engagements and photoshoots, to personal shopping and closet makeovers.
Through working with Melanie I now have the tools to put together outfits that are uniquely me and make me feel fantastic. She pushed me out of my comfort zone but in such a nice way that I didn’t even realize it was happening. All of a sudden I was in a fur vest and loving it. She has transformed my closet, my outlook on clothing and my love for bangles. Working with her has made me more polished and confident when I start my day. So glad she’s here today to talk to you ladies about developing confidence through clothes.
Ever see a picture of a girl and think, “I want to look just like her”. We have all been there, had a total girl crush. Chances are, that girl in the picture is not just pretty, or cool, but she’s exuding confidence. She might also be rocking a killer pair of shorts. How does she do it? Those ladies usually have one thing in common. They are truly self confident. You may think it’s the fedora she’s wearing that you wish you could pull off. But the actual culprit that is making you want to be her bestie is her self assured presence. As a former costume designer I can tell you first hand, that if an actress didn’t like what she was wearing, it showed on stage. Just in their attitude, they were telling the audience “I don’t feel good in this.” That is where I first started to notice a trend among women. CONFIDENCE IS EVERYTHING. Whether it is for an actress, a bride, or an entrepreneur, my ultimate styling goal is the same. To make you feel amazing in your clothes. So, how do we get said confidence? Well, I’m here to tell you.
First of all, let’s talk about your favorite item of clothing. Now think about how you feel when you wear it. That is how I want you to feel in all of your clothes. When I wear my favorite outfit I know I’m going to have a good day. I put that energy out into the world without even realizing it. From the moment I get dressed until the moment I come home I am giving off the “I look amazing and I know it vibe.” Think about what would happen if you felt that way every time you walked out your door. Pretty amazing, right?
There are a few small steps that will help make you exude that self-confidence we all crave.
1) Step one is going to sound basic. But it’s crucial. Let me break it down. Shower. Hair. Makeup. There is absolutely NO way to feel fantastic if you have greasy hair. As a new mom I totally get that it can be tricky to always find the time for a beauty routine. But trust me, you will be so happy you made the effort in the morning. It can be as simple as a quick shower, top knot and some lip gloss, or as time-consuming as a blow-out with full makeup. Whatever you have time for, but a little effort is imperative.
2) Making the outfit complete. One thing I love working with clients on is accessorizing. Accessories can turn a look from blah to polished in a pinch. It also will make you feel more “put together”. I’m a firm believer that you get more compliments on your outfit when you have accessories on. And nothing builds self-confidence more than compliments. Nothing!
3) Whatever your favorite body part is, flaunt it. Whatever your favorite body part is, flaunt it. Work it. Shake what yo mama gave ya. Why do you think people love Beyoncé so much? Is it because of her amazing highlights in Destiny’s Child? Well… it might have started there but that’s not the point I was trying to make. It’s because she is SELLING IT HARD. Her inner beauty shines through because it is clear that she loves herself, her body and her life.
Oh, what’s that? You’d like to see an example. BOOM. Here is Beyoncé with her hair and makeup done, wearing short shorts with accessories to spare. Love it.
So now comes the hard part. The same way we were envisioning our favorite outfit, now I want you to pinpoint something that you haven’t worn because you lacked the self-confidence to do so. Whether it’s a pair of shorts or a tight red dress I want you to go out and ROCK that outfit. Now, you might be saying “but this pencil skirt isn’t flattering”. Or, “Green doesn’t look right on my skin tone.” And to comments like this I am going to say the least “stylist” thing I could possibly say. None of that matters as long as it makes you feel good. I’m just not the kind of stylist who sticks to rules. Yes, of course if you really don’t like v-necks then don’t wear them. But if you have always wanted to wear a straw hat or a fuschia lipstick, or a sparkly dress, do it! I have a feeling you will surprise yourself and ultimately feel quite liberated.
When I went to Wikipedia and looked up the definition of “self confident”, this is what it said:
When one does not dwell on negative consequences one can be more ‘self-confident’ because one is worrying far less about failure or the disapproval of others following potential failure. One is then more likely to focus on the actual situation which means that enjoyment and success in that situation is also more probable.
WOW. Pretty mind blowing stuff, am I right? It starts with a pair of shorts and ends with enjoyment and success. Tweet it!
In true Sarah Jenks fashion, I’m giving you homework. I’d like you to take an item out of your closet that makes you feel amazing. Take a picture and instagram it, facebook it, tweet it, share it with the world. Make sure to use the hashtag #confidentstyle and tag @sarahejenks and @hohwithmelanie. And when you see someone else’s Instagram post, comment on it!
Let’s all help each other on this journey to self-confidence.
I talk a lot more about self-confidence through clothes in my FREE Style Guide “How to Style a T Shirt and Jeans”. In this guide, you will learn how to go jeans shopping for your body type, the right t-shirt to buy, as well as three ways to style them to perfection. Stick with me and you will feel well versed in the art of creating a look from head to toe. If you put in the work, you will undoubtedly see instant results and your confidence will start to soar. Head right here to get all the goods.
If you would like to work with me personally on how to gain confidence through your wardrobe, I would absolutely love to be a part of your journey. Click here so we can start the transformation.
Simple actions to take your life back, know your worth & feel alive no matter how drained, overwhelmed and far gone you feel.