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The prelude, part I
I just sat with a video of me transforming from my soft feminine self, to my edgy Scorpio self that I’m posting on Wednesday 🫣 and I immediately panicked.
Am I losing my mind?
Am I having a midlife crisis?
Shouldn’t Priestesses be more contained?
More proper?
Appear more stable?
Shouldn’t I be more consistent?
I mean, I’m almost 40. Get it together Sarah.
The voices of our brainwashing often feel like truth, but I know better now.
I believe that my ancestors were part of the burning times in Europe in the Middle Ages. A time when free, independent, free-thinking, sexually alive women were brutally tortured, raped, and killed for being themselves.
Since that time the moon, the womb, sensuality, independence, being outspoken, the color red, the color black, anger, rage, wild dance… the list goes on and on… have been demonized.
We’ve been told these parts of us are crazy, dangerous, and unhinged – and we don’t need to be related to people who were burned, this campaign was widespread and impacted every lineage on the planet. The truth is, it’s still woven into the fabric of our culture and beings.
We’ve been brainwashed to believe that any expression of who we are outside of the palatable, likable, “girl next door” is a sign that we’ve gone off the rails.
For so long, my experience of life was like having a wild horse in the basement.
Every once in a while, usually after a few glasses of wine, she’d get free and fuck shit up – not always in a good way – because I wasn’t present or conscious of her.
I knew that in order for me to be in integrity with walking a Sacred Feminine Path, I had to explore and integrate all parts of me – especially the ones that make me extremely uncomfortable.
And you know what, they make other people uncomfortable too, and standing in that fire is a big part of the work.
The range of my expression, and yours, is uncomfortable, but not crazy, there’s nothing more normal.
The range of my expression, and yours, is uncomfortable but not unstable, when we let out the wild horse and learn how to ride her, nothing teaches us how to be more balanced.
The range of my expression, and yours, is uncomfortable but not dangerous, when we light our own fires of our soul and learn how to tend to it, nothing makes us safer.
A woman armed with ancient wisdom and the resilience to be uncomfortable is unfuckwithable.
More to come…
Love,
Sarah
PS. What did this bring up in you? Just reply and lmk, I’d love to hear.
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