Blog · Your Self

Volume II (from Kelly)

Dear Goddess,

What does it mean to be wild & free? And why is everyone around me so obsessed with stability?




For you, my love, it means knowing that something is “out there” or “off the path” or “not for everyone” but deciding that it IS for you and doing it anyway. 

It’s saying “I do not care what you think because you are not me and only I decide what is for me.” Being wild and free, for you, is simply about being brave enough and bold enough to just be yourself.

Kelly, when were the times in your life where you felt really bold, and you just went after it — despite people around you thinking you were unstable? Can you remember?

Remember when you sat your husband down at that pub and told him it was time for you to quit your job? And that you were going to do it in the next morning even though you didn’t have a solid plan for what you’d do next and had been there for 10 years? 

Unstable? Perhaps.

Bold? Definitely. 

Worth it? No doubt. 

Remember when you knocked on that cute boy’s door in grad school and asked him if he knew where you could get a drink around here?

Unstable? Might have been. You just broke up with someone and you didn’t even know him.

Bold? We love a bold flirt. 

Worth it? You married him and have three kids, you tell me.

Remember when you hopped on a plane with a one-way ticket to Asia and set off to do something just because it sounded SO FUN?

Unstable? Well, sure.

Bold? Hell yes.

Worth it? It changed everything. 

Do you remember now, Kelly? These are 3 of 100 examples from this lifetime alone.

You had an inkling, a calling. 

A call to joy. To freedom. To adventure. To risk.

And you answered it. Many times. And it was everything.

You didn’t have a lot of fear, it’s true. I made you a risk-taker for a reason. But you are surrounded by people who were afraid (who are still afraid) and you chose NOT to let their fear, their doubt, or their judgment stand in the way of YOUR joy.

That is your wildness, your bravery, your freedom. It’s what others might call “unstable.”

Your bravery looks different from others. It’s different for everyone because we all come from a different set of circumstances that either cue us up for big risks or cue us up to stay in what is comfortable, stable, and known.

Do you, reader, remember a time when you chose “unstable” over safe and reliable? What happened?

Do you, reader, remember a time when you didn’t, but you always wonder what might have happened if you had?

When you can feel the “almosts” and the “I wish I had justs” and the “I was so close tos” – THAT is the place where you can feel the truth of the gift that “instability” can truly bare.

We all take everything so goddamn seriously. We make mountains out of molehills and we let the fears and doubts and judgments of others become ours to carry. When really, my love, they were never yours.

The truth is that we could all afford to choose the less stable option a little more often, to opt in for boldness and bravery and risk. Can you imagine how different you’d feel about your life if you could just lean even 10% more into claiming the “unstable” choices that you actually want to make? Can you imagine the effect of tens of thousands of women doing the same thing? Trusting their instincts & intuition, leading themselves.

So many of you are waffling – standing at the gate of who you’ve always been and the fullest expression of who you really are. Batting down the dreams that pop in, in the quiet moments, burying your wishes in the sand. Staying quiet when you want to scream at the top of your lungs. Choosing safety and stability over wildness and freedom. 

You are scared. Or the people around you are. Or the people who came before you were. So somewhere along the line you accidentally decided to wear their fear on you, draped over your shoulders like a heavy cloak so that you could feel safe. So that you could be… stable. 

But the cloak is an illusion, my love. There is no safety in holding yourself back. Not anymore.

The time to face the truth of who you are and what you really want to do has arrived. And moving from inaction to action is going to require you to make choices that others might deem unstable. Everything you need in order to say a HOLY YES to your next big assignment is already in you. And I know that you know that.

It is time to stop carrying all of the shit that is not yours and pretending that your legs are too heavy to move you forward. It is time to put their shit down so that you can walk lighter. Sprint if you desire. But move, my love, you must.

One way (this writer’s favorite way) to choose instability and boldness when others want you to play it safe is by unearthing Sacred Feminine wisdom, practice, and tools that have been deliberately hidden from us – and applying them in a new way. Your way.

This is the new paradigm of becoming. And I’d love for everyone to experience it.

Click here to join Unhinged on 5/23

A woman armed with ancient wisdom is unfuckwithable. And ok sure, maybe she is a little unstable 😜 

Lean in, beloved. Wobbly legs and all.

I’ve got you, 

We’ve got you.


The Goddess (Via Kelly)

PS. We’d be honored to witness your reflections to the questions the Goddess posed above. Just reply to this email. We’re here.


If you missed our messages in this series you can read them here:





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