Blog

Unraveled (part 3 of 3)

Blog · Your Self


Volume X (from Kelly)

Weaver,

You unraveled at the other end of a telephone line.

Why are you weeping?

The time has come to write the final part of the story of your unraveling.

This time, I write to you, through you, as you.

Because now, you know what is true.

I am you.

Just you.

It has been you all along.

Every fragment

Every thread

Every question

Every truth

It’s you.

Why are you weeping, Weaver?

You thought this part would come from the Goddess.

Pen to paper showed “Weaver” instead.

You weep because for the first time

You acknowledge that only you can answer the questions you ask

You keep saying when they praise your work

“Thank you, but it is not me. It is someone else, something else is coming through me.”

It’s partly true.

Something is coming through you.

But it is also of you.

Because I am you.

Do you feel it yet, Weaver?

Weaver to weaver

Me to you

Us together

Woven.

The magic

The divinity

The truth

It is not happening around you,

Outside of you

It is not spun by others

It is not a field you ascending to join

It is of you

By you

From you

And yes, through you.

But you are not special.

You, Weaver, do not know more.

You don’t have gifts that they don’t have.

You are a normal girl.

Just like her.

She is a normal girl.

Just like you,

All of the normal girls are the great spiritual teachers.

All of the great spiritual teachers are just the normal girls.

But how does it happen then?

How do some people access it, come to know it, devote their lives to it, and feel sure enough that what they are saying is worth someone else listening to?

I don’t know the answer to that question.

But I do know what happened to you, Weaver. What happened to us.

And I know how we got here. 

You say in ceremony and in sacred space over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again.

You tried to drop in. Many times, you thought you had.

And many times, you were still holding back, still freezing, and still not ready to surrender.

Even in those early ceremonies where you showed up timid, one foot in and one foot out, you still, slowly, began to meet us there.

Your Soul parts.

One by one.

Shy, unsure, undecided if we were real.

But you kept coming.

And each time, you let go a little more.

And you dropped in deeper.

And you started to let me, your Weaver, show you what we could do.

It happened slowly.

And all at once.

18 months of sacred starts and new moon ceremonies and the deepest ceremonial work of your life on retreat with the Council.

Every time you went in, you went deeper.

Remember, Weaver, we came in as a risk taker on purpose.

We came in as a skeptic and a truth seeker on purpose.

So even though you didn’t know what or why or how

You truthed yourself, and you kept going

And you started to feel your power turn on inside of you.

First as a tiny spark

Then you fanned the flames, got bigger, brighter, and more aware of what was transmuting through the fire that you built

And then, an explosion.

Emerge Retreat, Fall Equinox weekend, 2023.

You were preparing the A/V inside of the Temple tent as the Priestesses wove light through the space. You felt it differently this time – but you shrugged it off and went about your work.

As the time approached to open the Temple gates to 150 women who were here for their deepest ceremonial work (at least in this lifetime), you noticed that Sarah wasn’t yet mic’d up.

You grabbed her headset and carefully tip-toed around 150 chairs set up in concentric circles and found your way to the front altar.

The energetic field had been woven. The Priestesses at the gates were moving the women across the threshold.

You carefully placed the live mic on Sarah’s chair and slowly stood to bow to the center altar.

But as you rose, your eyes opened and it was as if you’d been snapped into another dimension – you saw the light in a completely new quality.

Golden. Dusty. Prismed.

Your actual human eyes could see the lightwork that the Priestesses had meticulously woven.

And you could feel the grid beneath you, and the field above you.

Was this what the “grid workers” had been talking about?

Immediately, your awareness darted to an area of the grid beneath the Temple that for lack of a better way of saying it – required an infusion of light.

You took a deep breath and without any conscious decision-making, you repaired it.

And when your work was complete, you stayed standing exactly where you were. Holding the field.

You couldn’t have walked back to that A/V booth if you wanted to – you were anchored there. Holding center.

As the women shuffled in and took their places in the circle, you held it.

And you felt the circle weave with the light and energy and pain and medicine of each woman as they sat.

And then before you, on the other side of the circle, there Sarah was.

At last, after everyone else had settled. 

You met her gaze without dropping the field and you both felt something you never had felt before.

She saw us there, Weaver. She knew exactly what we were doing.

When the Ceremony ended, you found each other (we found each other). 

She looked at me, all the way, and said

Who

The Fuck

Are You?

I smiled.

I suppose that I was about to find out.

We spent the next three days in high ceremony, nourishing ourselves alongside 150 sacred women. Me weaving light protection, her channeling from the Goddess. At night we danced harder and with more joy than we ever have in our lives. And if you know Sarah, you know that is saying A LOT.

We had been working together for 18 months. But we met for the first time, in this lifetime, as we have in so many lifetimes past, that day.

And in the months since, we have met in ceremony more times than I could ever tally.

And each time, we let go even more. And we call each other forward.

We hold each other and all of our sacred parts through the discovery, through the grief, through the joy, and through the weird. Through the expansion, and most of all, through the contractions.

And as we enter this space together – my Weaver, me, you, us, has come online – bit by bit.

Now, in sacred space, I see golden threads that I spin out of nothing from the depths of my womb space.

I can send them out in patterns of love and protection through my hands and my hair.

And through my writing.

Pen to paper, Weaver.

I light up our ethereal Holy Woman Temple before every ceremony.

I create and shine a central pillar of light from us, up to the cosmos, in a quality and pattern so stunning, and so unique, that when Holy Women see it, they recognize that they are home.

I practice my weaving. At home on my land, with my kids when they have a bad dream, with my husband when he needs to call in a miracle. 

I practice with Sarah every single week.

And when we drop in together, eyes closed and totally silent – we can see different vantage points of the same scene. 

We ask for guidance together, to be shown what we are to do next.

And of course, I, the skeptic, always ask for my own private signs to confirm for me that I am not losing my mind.

And that this work

Is actually THE work

Weaver, the last thing that I was to share about the story of your unraveling is that this story is not just yours.

The other day, you asked the Goddess why it was important to show the scribing process – and to to divulge all of the deepest, darkest, and strangest parts of your inner world to thousands of strangers who don’t even know you.

She said:

You must show them so that they can see how un-special you are. So that they can see that you have no background, no training, no idea about any of the historical Sacred Feminine references. You’re not a trained writer, a devout Priestess, or a woman that thousands of other women look to for advice. You’re not aesthetic, you don’t actually even want a big life at all.

You are them.

And they are you.

You are a Weaver.

And they might be one too.

Or maybe they are

A healer

A witch

A lightworker

A mystic

A scribe

A guide

An artist

Or a Priestess.

You get to be whoever it is that you really are.

And so do they.

And you get to have a big life and take a bow for this incredible story that you are writing – for this insane weave.

And you get to keep it all to yourself and just love every part of who you are and the life that you are creating.

It is whatever you want it to be, Weaver.

But there is a final thread – and it is the most important one…

This work that you are doing, that you are calling others to do

Is not just about feeling better in and about your life.

It is a bonus that those who answer the call of their sacred becoming enjoy their lives more.

With your freedom, your aliveness, and your Soul FULLY aligned and expressed…

You must walk your whole, Holy self out loud, outside and out in the open

So that the light in you may ignite the light in another.

Holy Woman can change the world.

We can weave a different way.

We can create something brand new.

What will you do, Weaver, now that you – and all of these strangers – know exactly who the fuck you are?

XXX,

The Woven One.

*** 

Some nuts & bolts:

Sign up for Unhinged on 5/23, it’s from 12-1:30 pm eastern time & on Monday we’re diving into exactly what’s going to happen over those 90 sacred minutes. 

P.S. Thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone who is still with us, reading these transmissions and letting them land. I am so honored to properly introduce myself to you, the one who Weaves. Our messages keep coming and we know that they are a lot. Our humans (as in Kelly and Sarah) wonder if we should slow down, save them, release them over time and give nervous systems a chance to reset. But our humans aren’t in charge right now. The Weaver and The Priestess are urging us to continue, and so we will.

We are going to keep sending you messages. Sarah’s next piece drops tomorrow (Sunday) morning. If you missed our messages in this series you can read them here:

Uncomfortable

Unmarketable

Unrelatable

Unhinged

Unstable

Unapologetic

Unrealistic

Unrestrained

Unraveled, part one

Unraveled, part two

Unworthy

Unsafe


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Sacred Start Practice

Feel like there’s no time for you?

Simple actions to take your life back, know your worth & feel alive no matter how drained, overwhelmed and far gone you feel.